MAY 3, 1999: 

NEVER BEEN KISSED. What an unexpected Beverly Hills, 90210 reunion! David Arquette (remember Diesel, the girlfriend-beating keyboard player?), Cress Williams (a.k.a. D'Shawn Hardell, token minority/basketball player/fan of Donna Martin), and Jeremy Jordan (teen Vanilla Ice, on the 90210 soundtrack album) team up for Never Been Kissed, 60610: the Chicago years! In the midst of all this fun is the woman once rumored to be Shannen Doherty's replacement, Drew Barrymore. This week's topic has to do with self-love. Poor awkward Josi (Barrymore), a mid-20s copy editor for the Chicago Tribune, gets a writing assignment to go undercover as a high-school senior and find the real scoop on teens. Josi is unable to approach the story objectively because she was tormented throughout her secondary education as the class geek, and she has frequent flashbacks that make her vomit. She confronts her demons with the help of her brother Rob (Arquette), and finally finds self-confidence through the acceptance of the popular kids, including the dreamy Guy (Jordan). --Higgins

VELVET GOLDMINE. A beautiful "fairy" tale, and deep eulogy to shallowness, Velvet Goldmine is a trippy look at the Glam Rock era. Fictionalized versions of David Bowie, Iggy Pop and Brian Eno take center stage in a world spawned by the magical gemstones of Oscar Wilde, where style always wins in the end, and all that glitters is gay. A flamboyant rock star who lived in terror of not being misunderstood is sought by a reporter and ex-fan 10 years after his mysterious disappearance. Director Todd Haynes uses homosexual Barbie dolls, swirling feathers, glowing green aliens and wardrobes that would embarrass Liberace to craft a Brother's Grimm version of the '70s. Starring the shockingly beautiful Johnathon Rhys-Meyers as a David Bowie stand-in, and Ewan McGregor as a guy who doesn't need a light saber. --DiGiovanna

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