Weekly Wire
Weekly Alibi Odds & Ends

By Devin D. O'Leary

Dateline: Washington--Breast implants have long been associated with illnesses such as connective tissue disease, arthritis, lupus and other disorders. Now researchers at the Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research Center in Seattle say that other risk factors may be involved. The researchers examined data on 80 women who had breast implants and concluded that women who get breast implants tend to have more sexual partners, drink more alcohol and use more hair dye. Such factors, say the researchers, should be considered when searching for the cause of mysterious illness.

Dateline: New York--The streets of New York City are safe once again, now that the Zucchini Bandit is behind bars. Carlos Diaz, 29, was sentenced to 18 years to life in prison last week for robbing a man of $20 and a watch by pretending a zucchini hidden under his jacket was a gun. Defense attorney Steven Silverblatt had argued that Diaz was innocently shopping for vegetables.

Dateline: California--Texas pilot Linda Finch's twin-engine Lockheed Electra 10-E successfully touched down last Wednesday at Oakland International Airport. The 46-year-old pilot had left the very same Oakland airport on March 17 in an attempt to duplicate Amelia Earhart's 'round-the-world flight. Finch used the same kind of plane and followed the same 26,000 mile course that Earhart failed to complete 60 years ago when her plane was lost over the South Pacific.

Dateline: Venezuela--After listening to a deluge of complaints from conservationists, Venezuela's Environmental ministry dumped plans to allow a limited jaguar hunt to benefit the Venezuelan jaguar. The seriously confused Ministry planned to charge $12,000 a head, then use the money to protect the rare animals.

Dateline: California--A pharmacist at Longs Drug Store in Temecula, Calif., was reprimanded for refusing to fill a woman's morning-after birth control pill prescription. The woman's doctor had instructed her to take two Ovral pills immediately and two more within 12 hours. Longs and the American Pharmaceutical Association claim that conscientious refusal is OK. Others disagree.

Dateline: Tennessee--Through her lawyer, Mother Teresa has requested that a Nashville coffee shop, which has been displaying a honey-bun that miraculously bears the nun's image, stop selling souvenirs based on the breakfast pastry. Mother Teresa refused a 15 percent share of proceeds for her Sisters of Mercy charity. The coffee shop owner is complying.

Dateline: Iowa--As usual, administrators at Luther College in Decorah, Iowa, did their best to break up the annual (end of exams) naked soccer game. The result was one student arrest and even more nakedness in protest.

--Compiled by Devin D. O'Leary




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