Weekly Wire
Weekly Alibi Odds & Ends

By Devin D. O'Leary

JULY 28, 1997: 

Dateline: England--Christie's auction house in London unloaded the world's most expensive piece of mold last Friday. The British Science Museum bid an unexpected $25,300 for a small piece of mold once owned by researcher Alexander Fleming. Back in 1928, Fleming used the mold to discover penicillin. The mold did come in a wooden box with an inscribed brass plaque so, you know, bargain.

Dateline: Germany--Late last week, the U.S. Air Force issued a terse press release denying a German tabloid newspaper's report that famed bandleader Glenn Miller actually died of a heart attack in a French brothel in 1944. The Air Force is sticking by its original claim that Miller was killed when his plane crashed into the English Channel.

Dateline: Missouri--An armed robber tried to knock off a convenience store in the tiny town of St. Peters. When his car wouldn't start, the bandit gave his $100 booty back to the two 7-11 clerks he had just robbed. In return, the clerks gave his car a jump start and waited 40 minutes before calling police. "We have a friendly town out here," police officer David Kuppler said of the quiet St. Louis suburb.

Dateline: California--The famed Hollywood Wax Museum has moved their statue of boxer Mike Tyson from the "Hall of Sports Heroes" to the "Chamber of Horrors." Tyson's waxwork figure now rests beside that of Hannibal the Cannibal from Silence of the Lambs.

Dateline: Colorado--Gonzo journalist Hunter S. Thompson was removed from serving on the jury in the drunken driving case against '70s pop singer John Denver. Thompson, who has had his own alcohol-related troubles in the past, was excused for medical reasons. Thompson's sciatica makes it difficult to sit for long periods of time.

Dateline: South Carolina--Callers to a toll-free suicide prevention hotline have discovered a new meaning for the term "hot" line. The Columbia, S.C.-based suicide hotline, which is listed in more than a dozen phone books around the country, apparently stopped paying for their service in late June or early July. The 800 number was then passed on to a phone sex line. No word on how many have been saved from suicide since.

Dateline: Washington--A 43-year-old man held police at bay for about an hour last Wednesday in Issaquah, Wash., after assaulting an IBM with a deadly weapon. According to the woman he lived with, the man had become increasingly agitated over the past week. The man's troubles reached their peak when he gunned down his personal computer. When he had problems with the computer in his home office, the man pumped four bullets into the hard drive, one into the monitor and one into a nearby file cabinet. The man was taken to Harborview Medical Center in Seattle for evaluation.

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