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Odds & Ends
By Devin D. O'Leary
AUGUST 31, 1998:
Dateline: Iran--What do "Macho Man" Randy
Savage and fundamentalist Islamic females have in common? Well,
for one thing, they can now be found under the same roof. In a
surprisingly feminist move, the vice president of Iran's wrestling
federation announced that women will now be permitted to attend
men's wrestling events. A special viewing section will be allocated
during the World Wrestling Championships in Tehran on Sept. 8-11,
so that women can follow the blow-by-blow. In the wake of the
1979 Islamic Revolution, all women were banned from attending
men's sporting events.
Dateline: Crete--Although it's traditionally considered
bad luck for a groom to see his bride in her wedding dress before
the ceremony, the custom took an odd turn off the coast of Greece
Saturday when a Cretan bride-to-be suffered a nervous breakdown
after seeing her groom in her wedding dress the night before their
wedding. The future husband and wife team were celebrating at
separate parties, when the bride's friends asked to see her new
wedding gown. The group made its way back to the bride's house
where, to their surprise, they discovered the groom dressed in
the
wedding gown and kissing the best man. The wedding did not take
place.
Dateline: Ohio--Robert J. Hogg, 29, was released from an
Akron, Ohio, prison last week after serving out a term for sexual
battery. Hogg immediately returned to the home of his ex-girlfriend
(the one he was accused of sexually battering) and attempted to
electrocute her by ordering her into the bathtub at scissorpoint
and trying to toss in an electric hair dryer. The woman successfully
called police when Hogg went to look for an extension cord. He
now faces attempted murder charges.
Dateline: Florida--Upholding the fine history of redneck
brilliance, Randell James Baker, 45, is being held in a Florida
jail after shooting his longtime friend Robert Callahan in the
head with a .22. Apparently, the two trigger-happy pals enjoyed
"surprising" one another by shooting the button off
the top of each other's baseball caps--a practice that occurred
every time one of them bought a new cap. This time around, Baker
missed, and the jolly tradition came to an abrupt end.
Dateline: Illinois--Twenty-nine-year-old Jerry Loftis,
the United States' leading sky surfing pioneer (and ubiquitous
TV commercial pitchman for assorted "extreme" consumer
products), plunged to his death at the World Free Fall Convention
in Illinois when his chute failed to open.
Dateline: Illinois--The medical board of Illinois has announced
plans to "discipline" Dr. Bennet Braun, a prominent
psychiatrist, whose repressed-memory therapy seems to have gone
a bit too far. Braun successfully convinced patient Pat Burgus,
42, that she possessed 300 separate personalities, was a member
of a secret cult and sexually abused her children (two of whom
she was persuaded to hospitalize for three years). Burgus was
also convinced by Dr. Braun that she was a cannibal and ate human
flesh meatloaf made from 2,000 people a year--despite the fact
that she lived in a small town and would have consumed the entire
population in short order. Burgus successfully sued the dotty
doc for $10 million.
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